It’s possible, and not even that hard

By kate on March 7th, 2008

Before I became a parent, we had some strong ideas about what we would and wouldn’t do, especially as it relates to gender and consumerism. However, I always kept an open mind since I didn’t really know what it was like to be a parent. Despite being a bit shocked by the use of Baby Einstein videos by very smart friends of mine, I refrained from passing judgment, because maybe it really WAS necessary to get such a break from time to time. I kept hearing that, with a girl, there was no escaping the flood of pink princessy items, and while I hoped otherwise, I left a little mental room for it to be true just in case.

Well. After having been through the first two years of parenting myself, I am very happy to report that NONE of that is mandatory! And honestly, it’s not that much work, either. It’s totally possible to:

Dress your girl in colors other than pink
Avoid character-branded merchandise
Avoid irritating battery-operated toys
Give away any offensive clothing or toys you may get
Have a young child who never watches TV or videos
Avoid stupid children’s music and play good music for your child instead

I’m very proud of the fact that Ruby has no idea who Dora the Explorer, Bob the Builder, or the Sesame Street characters are. I’m sure she’ll pick up on them eventually, when she goes to school, but there’s no need for her to know about them now. As nice and cute (and even educational) as they may seem, I never forget that they’re specifically designed to use a kid’s affection to get to their parents’ wallet. Ruby has stuffed friends (a teddy bear, kitten, beluga, and doll are her favorites) who, while mass-produced, are not vanguards of a massive marketing campaign.

The things above were easy. There are other things that we’ve done as parents that were a little more work. Having one parent at home made it possible to do hippie things like use cloth diapers and wipes and make Ruby’s baby food from scratch. The parenting work I’m most proud of, that of helping Ruby become independent and disciplined, takes the most time and effort, but is obviously not impossible.

I do need to acknowledge the importance of having a family that respects our wishes. It’s been so great that my parents and Steve’s parents understand our thoughts about toys and clothes and take the time to find wonderful gifts that don’t cross the line. I think it’s vital that new or expecting parents take the time to express their thoughts up front about what they think is important. We did that by writing the blog posts linked above, as well as through conversation, and I think it helped to make things clear before any gifts were given.

I still take the open-minded approach when it comes to the future. I’m going to try to keep doing things this way as Ruby enters preschool and then elementary school, but I can’t be sure it’ll all go the way I want. All I can say for sure is: have hope, new parents – for at least the first two years, it’s possible!

Filed under: consumerism, parenting | 10 Comments »

Obama vs. Clinton: their records

By kate on February 21st, 2008

I really enjoyed this fact-filled post comparing the Senate records of Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton. Hopefully, it should put to rest the ridiculous argument that Obama is all talk and no action or details (which is quite false).

Filed under: current events | 2 Comments »

Short and well rehearsed

By kate on February 13th, 2008

I got a subscription to Wondertime magazine for my birthday this year, and have been surprised at how much I enjoy the articles. (It’s a Disney property and the ads are another story; I’ve started a collection of egregiously sexist ones for the shock and humor value.)

A recent article really struck a chord with me, and it introduces a parenting principle I’d like to adopt: short and well rehearsed.

My children were no longer allowed to interrupt us with “Watch this!” unless whatever we were going to see was short and well rehearsed. When applied to a dinner party, that meant rehearsed for, say, an hour, and performed for, say, three minutes. The results were amazing…. (read entire article)

Filed under: parenting, reading | 1 Comment »

We need a “Mayor Gridlock” shirt, size 2T

By kate on February 11th, 2008

Ruby was fingerpainting this morning. Without any input from me, here is what she drew:

Filed under: current events, seattle | 2 Comments »

Dream job: Alpha Tester

By kate on February 8th, 2008

My network of ex-Jobster colleagues contains an unusually large number of small startups. I can count about 14 startups that have been founded or co-founded by ex-Jobsters, and many others who employ ex-Jobsters. Because of my connections at these new ventures, I’ve had the opportunity lately to do some alpha and beta testing, and have been having a lot of fun.

I’ve always enjoyed taking the time to give detailed feedback when asked. I contributed to my former employers this way, and often send bug reports for the software/sites I use, but what’s really fun is engaging with a new, hungry company that is trying to get it right.

It started with Trumba about three years ago, when I was a beta user (unfortunately, I soured on Trumba later). Of course, I helped my husband improve Feedwhip, and later Picnik. More recently, I’ve worked with startups like AirSet, Stuffopolis, SimpleSpark, Urbanspoon, RescueTime, Mergelab, and I Want Sandy to identify bugs and make suggestions.

I should point out that this help is unpaid, and contributed as a user (rather than employee or consultant). I do it because I really enjoy trying out new things in my neverending quest to get everything to work just the way I want. It’s invigorating for me to interact with these entrepreneurs, see the passion and commitment they have for their products, and dream together about the best way to solve a problem.

The more highly I think of a product, the more likely I am to send in lots of bugs and feedback. I’m cheering for these baby companies to succeed, and so contribute what I can to help. If only alpha tester were a paying job, I’d do it full time.

Filed under: technology, work | 4 Comments »

Parenting principle: Aim over her head

By kate on January 28th, 2008

I have a parenting principle that I try to keep in mind at all times: aim over her head. By this, I mean that I never want to underestimate what Ruby can do or understand. She surprises me a lot of the time, by showing me that she picked up on something complicated or subtle. So instead, I try to overestimate a little, and expect that she won’t get quite everything at first.